Dunno how to feel?

Its just so tiring .. i duno y.. my daily routine? my love life?.. i duno.. its been so long since anyone else stepped into my life and bring me the smiles and laughters i always nvr failed to experience... but 8 mths ago.. it seems to have stopped... those surprises.. those happiness.. everything has somehow changed.. wad had been promised was broken again and again.. how much more tolerant can i be? somethings i know was hidden from me in fear i'll get angry... but hey.. i know wad u're doing n thinkin.. im a girl and i have strong intuitions u'd nvr imagined.. Feeling like a caged bird and someone who's just been sent down to life live and finish life.. its like a duty... coming hm to slp.. the need to think for someone. the need to entertain.. to care to listen and to understand.. den to work... no friends other den bong n toot.. no brothers which i can even tok to and confide to... wad else is left in life for me to do? r all relationships gonna end up this way? now these 2 days without him ard.. im like gettin used to being alone again... im sick of everything..